Always In His Hands

My Brothers 001

Happy Birthday, “Butch” Mack Tucker

August 1, 1945

I know I have already written about the grieving process and today I grieve for the loss of my brother. I was denied that precious gift December 24th 2001 when my oldest brother had a stroke and died while my daughter was in the hospital fighting for her life. I lied to her so I could be at my brother’s bedside as he took his last breath. The day I left his funeral I hid his death deep in my heart as my daughter was too fragile to hear the truth.

I miss my brother daily and I think I am finally in the stage of acceptance; however I do believe because I was angry at him for dying and leaving me alone to attend to Billy and my aging Mom it slowed my recovery. I was glad when a friend shared with me anger is part of the healing process.

Butch often strayed from God, but I know that God never strayed from him and held him tightly in His right hand. Butch and I celebrated Jesus’ birthday yearly; I hold onto the knowledge and the hope that I will be rejoined with my brother when God calls me home.

I would just like to encourage anyone who feels separated from God to read Psalm 139 7-12 especially verse 10; you may not feel Him, but he is there, He never pulls away from you.

Today on my brother’s birthday, I would like to end this blog with words he wrote in the front of his pocket bible, “If men see or remember Mack more than Christ than I have failed, for it is Christ working through me. If they remember a man sent from God I do better, but if they remember God and his Son I do well, extremely well.”

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